The House of Netjer, a Kemetic Orthodox Temple

[PUBLIC] About the Kemetic Orthodox Religion => [PUBLIC] Netjer (Our Gods & Goddesses) => Topic started by: Maautseshat on August 14, 2012, 03:05:23 am

Title: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Maautseshat on August 14, 2012, 03:05:23 am
Em hotep,

I am moving in with my fiance this month, and he has a cat who is quite attached to him. He is very vocal, follows him around meowing from the moment he gets home, and cries when he leaves the room. He used to have a cat roommate- they fought all the time. He also pees on any clothes you leave on the floor, on blankets, and on the bed.

Don't get me wrong- I like Benny. He tolerates me. He likes to sleep on my feet, and certainly likes it when I give him treats. I'm not really a cat person though. Benny might like that I'm there to keep him company when the fiance is at work, or he may be annoyed to have me around all the time. Probably the biggest problem is that I have 4 pet rats that are moving in with me!

So, I wonder if I learned to communicate with Bast I might improve my relationship with the cat world? Could I become a cat person? What say you, those who travel in kitty circles? Any tips would be greatly appreciated. What kind of offerings does Bast like? Is She open to the appeals of rat and dog people? Would She teach me to be a cat whisperer?

In desperation,

Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Maainakhtsen on August 14, 2012, 04:30:26 am
In my experience, cats love nothing more than to convert "not cat people".

Keep the rats where he can't access them until you know for sure whether he will try to get into their cage.

You'll be fiiiiine. ;)
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Tuwer on August 14, 2012, 08:03:34 am
Hotep Maut!

Quote from: Maainakhtsen
In my experience, cats love nothing more than to convert "not cat people".

First, very much this! The conversion of the masses is definitely one of the main goals in a cat's life... that, and sleep, and food. ;)

As for getting Momma's attention, and Her help in gaining an "in" with understanding and living peacefully Benny? The first offering that I'd suggest, you're already doing: giving it a try, spending time with him, giving him a chance to get to know you. To "sweeten" the deal some with Momma, I'd suggest offerings of honey-milk, sunflowers, music, and most of all, anything you find joyful in your life.

And, of course, the advice of keeping the rats in non-Benny range is definitely good, as well. :)
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: rev. ubenet on August 14, 2012, 12:34:25 pm
i don't know Bast very well, but my family calls me the cat whisperer! \\o/ i also have a roommate who is not a cat person (she's actually mildly allergic), and my cat is OBSESSED with her. they have staring contests sometimes, it's adorable.

my roommate has to keep chloe away from her things because allergy, and you'll probably want to do the same with the rats and their things. she likes to say "NOT FOR CATS!" in a loud voice, and then chloe scampers away and glares at her from the doorway instead. works pretty well!

i usually get cats to like me by sitting on the floor, not making sudden movements, and when they show themselves, calmly letting them sniff my fingers and then pet themselves using my fingers. it took my mom a couple of weeks to get her cat used to her that way (she was not the most popular kitty at the shelter :( ), but now they're inseparable.
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Tarekbast on August 14, 2012, 02:29:43 pm
I agree with all of the above. The floor is a great place to hang out with and get to know cats. Also good to remember cats are unique individuals and what works for one will not always work for others. Plus, Benny's probably a little jealous of you stealing his time with the fiance too, maybe you both could give Benny massive love at the same time. Once he gets used to the fact that you're not going away, he'll warm up to you.
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Siwy on August 14, 2012, 10:49:53 pm
Ok, peeing on the bed... is Benny neutered?  If not, then he will pee everywhere, especially where he's marked before.  There's enzymatic cleaners out there that break up the cat pee (cats have phosphorous in the pee, use a blacklight and those blacklight glasses to see where else he's marked), but I can't remember what the name of the cleaner is; check your local pet store for it.

Also, play with him with an interactive toy!  That'll help burn his energy so that he will sleep through the night and not bother you and your fiance when you try to sleep.  Plus it's a good way to have him get to know you.  Cats don't get jealous, they actually get territorial, and getting down on the floor with him is a good idea and let him smell ya, but let him come to you.

All that I have learned from watching "My Cat from Hell" featuring Jackson Galaxy, a cat behaviorist and all-around awesome guy.

Now, as for Mom, She loves fish!  I offer it every so often (especially crab and crab on things [crab butter popcorn anyone?]) informally and it's usually a hit.  Mint chocolate chip ice cream goes over well (I usually offer a cone of Blue Bell, but that's my preference [it has dark chocolate chips]), as does oreos.  Chicken is good too.  As for non-food offerings, she loves perfumes, malachite and sandalwood inscense (though I've gotten her some white peach inscense I think she'll like).
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: TabauAmunet on August 15, 2012, 12:55:41 am
I definitely agree with all of the above for getting to know Bast!

As for the cat and you getting along? Well, if he's not sure about having you around all the time you can try and learn what he considers his territory and give him that space. Eventually he should warm up to the idea of you coming to him unsolicited or being around when he's not necessarily "in the mood" for human contact.

Oh, and catnip. Catnip is a great way to help yourself get used to cats. It's an interactive thing while the cat isn't in your face. It also helps bond the two of you without requiring cuddle time or anything similar from you. Playing with the cat can bring out the doglike aspects that rats have, which could help you adjust too. And well, you just gotta get to know the cat. Cats are more like roommates than some people give them credit for.
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Bestekeni on August 15, 2012, 02:41:16 am
I can't give any cat advice for obvious reasons, but I can talk Bast and, concidentally, rats.  Bast is my beloved and the one who brought me to the house, but I have never actually experienced her as a cat. To me, she is pure, unadulterated emotion and sensation and she enjoys offerings of things that bring you sensual joy -- that's why I think she enjoys offerings of things like teas and chocolates and perfumes. I have even offered her swatches of fabric that I found myself idly petting at the fabric store because I enjoyed the texture so much.

As for the rats, that's a kind of funny story.  When I was a teenager, I had pet rats, all female. I brought home a fourth from the pet store and surprise, a few days later, she gave birth. I was kind of freaked out -- I had to make a makeshift second cage for this rat and her babies and I'd never had a pet with babies before.

At the time, I basically was an atheist, but I'd always loved Egypt and my friend had given me a statue of Bast for Chanukah.  I felt a sudden impulse to make a little necklace for the statue and I asked Bast to look after the babies. Long story short, every one of them had a good home lined up by the time they were ready to leave their mother.  That's how I met Bast :)
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Maautseshat on August 15, 2012, 12:29:49 pm
Wow, that's great that Bast could love the rats too. This is all great advice! Thank you! Benny is fixed, and JW (the fiance) has taken him to the vet for the peeing. It is definitely peeing and not marking. Ugh, I have a lot of packing to do.
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Shezep_shuty on August 16, 2012, 10:44:59 am
I haven't heard anyone mention the no eye contact rule. Eyes mean 'stop.' Not paying attention means 'go.' (With kittens, sometimes 'go' means 'attack the ankles!') So when you're sitting on the floor, read a book or something and pretend that it has nothing at all to do with him. He will probably start wondering why that paper thing you're looking at is more interesting than he is and come over to check it out. This is why non cat people have an easier time.
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Meresinepu on August 16, 2012, 01:09:16 pm
Hotep Maaut *henu*

Anything is possible!  I'm a dog kid but have had cats all my life too so I can do either.  I've got 6 cats split between my daughter and myself and I have the batch that acts psycho and wants to pee on everything :P

I've had to deal with the clothes on the floor and bed.  In our case the cat was marking territory and using clothes to show his anger. He was upset over the move(s) and having to share me with the other cat.

I've got the 3 fut babies now and two who still try to do the pee job when they get upset or forget.  I keep a plastic camping tarp on my bed these days just in case.  Its not super fashionable but it does the trick at minimal expense.

Offer Bast sweet treats and keep offering them to Benny too.  I'd keep the rats in their cages until you see how Benny will react to them.  When my cat tried to eat the bird I put the cat into the bird cage with both parrots and they jumped on the cat and freaked her out so bad she has never tried to stalk them again.  It sounds awful but the video would have won me a fortune!

With a little luck and lots of treats you too can be a cat whisperer :)   Hang in there.

Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: kathleen on August 17, 2012, 08:01:23 pm
Much good advice here, both about learning to be a cat whisperer and getting to know Bast!  :)  I'll add just a couple of things:

Like someone else said, a lot of intense, direct eye contact can be interpreted as threatening to animals.  But with cats, if you *blink* at them *slowly* while you're looking at them, it means the opposite and indicates to them that you are *not* threatening and you like them.  Or look at them *briefly* and then look away.  It's *breaking* the eye contact that indicates to them that you mean them no harm and are comfortable in their presence.  ;)

You mentioned your fiance has already had Benny to the vet and was told that he is peeing, not marking.  Did the vet give any further information or suggestions?  Once territorial marking has been ruled out, other common reasons for cats to urinate on soft things like cloth/bedclothes, etc., is that they may have a medical condition like a urinary tract infection or crystals in the urine (which can be particularly dangerous for male cats), or else it indicates a dissatisfaction with whatever type of kitty litter your fiance is using, or something else about the litterbox (location, type of box {covered vs. uncovered}, size of box, etc.) is not right for Benny.  Have there been any changes in the litterbox location or type of box or litter?  Also, cats who have been declawed will pretty commonly have issues with peeing or pooping outside the litterbox and on soft things because it hurts their paws to dig in the litter and they associate the pain with the litterbox.  I don't know if this is the case with Benny, but I thought I'd mention it since a lot of vets don't tend to tell people about the connection.

Separation anxiety is not as common in cats as it is in dogs, but cats do get it, too, and it sounds like that might be going on with Benny and his dad/your fiance. Some of the ways to deal with this can include a kind of desensitization therapy where the owner/guardian leaves for very short period and then returns, so the cat understands that not every departure will mean an extended absence; not making a "big deal" out of leaving the house by giving extended goodbyes.  The constant meowing and following him from room to room might also just indicate a desire for more attention and playtime. I don't know how old Benny is, but if he's under 2 years old, that could be part of it, too.  Cats don't really become full adults until about age 2, so he may settle down more as he gets older.

I'd really advise against allowing a cat to play with pet rats.  In fact, it might not be a bad idea to wash your hands between handling the rats and petting Benny.  With some animals, the scent on your hands of another animal that falls into the category of their natural prey *could* potentially make your *hands* smell like natural prey, and that would be bad.  I'm not saying this would necessarily happen, but I thought it was worth mentioning.  Watching the rats in their cage would probably be entertaining for Benny, but I'd be very careful about allowing them any direct access to each other.  Accidents can happen so quickly.    

Whoa, this is turning into a really long post, so I guess I'll leave it at that!  Lots of luck and good wishes to you!
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Maautseshat on October 08, 2012, 10:29:25 am
Update- we are all doing very well! Benny likes the extra attention from me, and lets me pet him. He still whines a lot though. Only one peeing incident since I moved in, and it was in JW's closet. Benny seems mostly bemused by the rats. He stares at them sometimes but, other than that, leaves them alone. I play with the rats in the bedroom with the door closed. I finally finished putting together my Bast and rat shrines. There's been mostly harmony in our new home!
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Maainakhtsen on October 10, 2012, 05:31:20 am
So glad to hear it. :)
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Tamiwi on October 11, 2012, 08:46:59 am
Time usually takes care of all, animals like routine...especially cats lol!! Glad to hear it
Title: Re: Beautiful Bast, can we be friends?
Post by: Linda on October 11, 2012, 01:05:45 pm
That's great news! :)