The House of Netjer, a Kemetic Orthodox Temple

[PUBLIC] About the Kemetic Orthodox Religion => [PUBLIC] Serving the World: Ma'at In Action => Topic started by: Maretemheqat on August 18, 2015, 12:24:24 pm

Title: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on August 18, 2015, 12:24:24 pm
Em Hotep!

Thank you for taking the time to read over this section. For those of you who don't know me, I am Reverend Maretemheqat, daughter of my mother Heqat. I wanted to do a short post here, about something my Mother and I have been discussing over the last little while, and Her desire to bring it to you.

She's wanting me to open up some dialogue with all of you about gratitude.

Over the last week, I began to take stock of the times I have expressed gratitude towards others, like using a simple "please" and "thank you" when a situation warrants it. As I did so, I discovered that many of the times I say "please" and "Thank you", they are often said out of ritual habit and that there is no feeling of gratitude behind them. Its become a sort of robotic autonomic response.

In reflection, I'd like to start saying these words with a bit more emotion than I have been lately, in order to make sure that the person to whom I am saying them to can genuinely hear that I mean "please" and "thank you."

I'd like to invite all of you to do the same. Take stock and count how many times you say "please" and "thank you" in a given day, and note the force of emotion behind it. Was it weak? Was it empathetic? Was it something said out of habit? Did the other person respond to you? How did they respond to you? Keep these things in the back of your mind, and see where things take you.

I'd like for people to share their experiences too, if you feel comfortable doing so. I'd like to see what things people have to say about their efforts and the responses they get, both outside and inside themselves.

Let's talk about when people on the receiving end of your gratitude are not willing to accept it, or talk about finding gratitude in the most difficult of situations.

Senebty.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on August 21, 2015, 11:54:31 am
Em Hotep!

I held my first Gratitude chat yesterday with some of my fellow siblings of the faith, and I thought to post the notes I used here for you all to read. Hopefully these will help you on your journey towards Gratitude as well.


Importance of Gratitude- The Who, What, When, Where and Why
Who: Who can be grateful or express gratitude? Everyone can. For some its more difficult than others, but it is important to know that everyone can express their gratitude in a way they are most comfortable or familiar with. IE: Saying thank you, returning a favour, acknowledging their effort, etc.

What: What can we express our gratitude for? Pretty much anything, including tough situations. While it is difficult to express gratitude in a situation where we feel fear or anxiety, it is actually an opportunity to express gratitude for the supports in place, or being thankful for being able to take a moment to examine what made the situation happen in the first place.

When: When can you express your gratitude? Any time! At the moment it dawns on you to do so, and even later on when you remember again. Thanking a person twice is usually enough, and sometimes adding a personal touch to the thank you is always nice.

Where: Where can you express your gratitude? On paper, face to face, in a journal, to the Gods.

Why: Why do we express our gratitude? For many reasons. It makes us feel good. It helps us see the positives in bad situations and how to navigate around them. It helps us to recognize when someone else has made the effort to help us and strengthens that relationship.

How to cultivate Gratitude
Keep a gratitude journal. The journal can be as fancy or as minimal as you like, and you can jot down, daily, the things you feel grateful for.

Keep criticisms to a minimum. There is a difference between constructive feedback, and criticism. Just like complaining, and gossiping. Given Hemet’s Saq Nisut discussions on heka and Rev. Raheri’s discussions on the 42 Negative Confessions, speech is something that features prominently in our faith and lives. Giving word to negative things makes them grow. There is a difference though in acknowledging a tough situation and a complaint. Gratitude helps you to realize and recognize the difference.

Compliment someone daily. If you notice something about a person that you think looks particularly flattering, if you’ve taken notice of someone’s efforts on your behalf, if you admire the way someone handled a particularly difficult task; SAY SO. Compliment them on their ability to handle themselves under pressure. Chances are, they’ll return your gratitude by giving you a thank you.

Get involved in something you feel passionate about. When you donate your time, money or talent, you begin to see the ‘behind the scenes’ effort it takes to maintain the organization. It gives you a greater appreciation for what goes in within it. And you’re helping out. So its a win-win for everyone involved.

Practice humility with your gratitude. This might seem like a no brainer, but you’d be surprised. When you say thank you, make sure that “thank you” comes with no strings attached. Don’t say it with the expectation of being told “You’re welcome” or even getting an acknowledgement of your gratitude. Much like heka and volunteering, give your energy out, and let it go. Where it goes from there is beyond your control.

The Art of Giving a Compliment- The Do’s and Don’ts
DO- Be respectful and genuine. Fakeness and insincerity can be spotted from a mile away. When giving a compliment to someone, make sure that you are sincere in your efforts.

DO- Be specific in your compliment. Rather than a generic “That looks fantastic”, try adding something specific. What caught your eye? What do you remember most? Use that. Turn the previous statement into something like “That colour of dress really looks fantastic on you.”

DO- Mind your body language. Be engaged. Look a person in the eye. Keep your arms neutral or open.

DO- Give compliments where others can hear them. It gives validity to your statement when you compliment someone in front of others.

DON’T- Give a back-handed compliment. IE: “You look nice for a....” or telling a girl she looks pretty with make-up on gives the implication that she isn’t pretty without it or normally. NB: A'aqyt gave a really good example of a back-handed compliment in the chat. Thank you for sharing that A'aqyt!

DON’T- Make a compliment about you. The fact that you are already giving a compliment already expresses the idea that you admire someone for a skill-set you might not have. A good example? “I really like the way you handled the organization of that meeting last week. It was really well done and clear. Thank you.”   Not: “I really like the way you handled the organization of the meeting last week. I could never do that, I’m so cluttered!”

DON’T- Blow off a compliment given to you! If someone is taking the time to compliment you, they have recognized your efforts and are taking the time to do so. The appropriate response to a compliment is usually “Thank you.” No ‘Buts’ to be added. A thank you is all you need, AND it helps you express gratitude as well.

How have you been doing this week? Have you been able to express your gratitude to someone? How was it received?

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Temseniaset on August 21, 2015, 12:54:15 pm
It was a wonderful chat, thank you for hosting.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Tjesi on August 21, 2015, 08:34:03 pm
I wish I could have attended.

My experience with gratitude this week has felt very strong. Even while there have been difficulties and health issues, I have been so aware of all the support I have from known and unknown people. This support has truly touched me and I have tried my best to express my gratitude. This is very different from how I used to handle such situations. I would not have been conscious before of all the positive things that appeared. I would only have been upset. I'm not sure what affected this change.


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Awibemhethert
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on August 22, 2015, 11:21:51 am
Em Hotep!

Ibi: I hope it is a welcome change? One of the things I have noticed about gratitude is that is does change the nature of...well, change. Change is often something scary and confidence draining. Because its unknown, because you have no control, because you don't know how things are going to end up, its very easy to fall into a pattern of negativity or anxiety that changes our personality. Its stress, for sure, and stress does wicked things to the mind and body.

I think because you've been more mindful of your gratitude towards others for helping you, you've been able to cultivate a good coping strategy, and have been able to find successful ways to navigate your particular situation. You've reduced your stress, which relaxes the body and eases the mind.

I hope that your situation continues to improve, and thank you for sharing about your week. :)

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Tjesi on August 22, 2015, 12:15:16 pm
Thank you, Rev. Maret. Yes, I think it has made a big difference to me this week, to be able to see all the things I have to be grateful for. It does make change easier for me.


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Awibemhethert
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on August 24, 2015, 12:17:42 am
Em Hotep everyone,

Today was one of those days where I failed to acknowledge moments of gratitude during situations that were tough to handle. Working on the Unit was very busy today, and very sad, for various reasons. I can't go into too much detail because of PHIA (Personal Health Information Act) reasons, but suffice to say this would have been a prime opportunity to work on some of the things that were discussed in the chat.

This is not to say, however, that I cannot take a moment now to reflect on the moments where I was very thankful. I am thankful that my health has been steadily improving, as today's shift had me on my feet for most of it. I am thankful that I was able to help a bereaved family with the loss of their child, by means of a simple act of kindness- getting water, kleenex, some juice and some cookies to nibble on, when they were saying good-bye to their baby. I am thankful and humbled have been part of that process, and use it as an opportunity to see the various things that are done for these families through volunteer work. If it wasn't for volunteers, we wouldn't have had a little gown to put the baby in to send him home with. I am thankful that some of the nursing staff have a sense of humour.

Why am I sharing this? Because its important to not beat yourself up over not being on the ball with these sorts of moments. Eating your heart, so to speak. And we know from the 42 Negative Confessions, that eating your heart is not so good a thing.

So remember when you express gratitude, that its also a way of being kind to yourself.

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Sarytsenuwi on August 24, 2015, 11:45:12 am
I've had some moments of gratitude lately surrounding health matters, that I'm not sure I would have recognized without this ongoing project. I've experienced gratitude for being able to better understand some of what my mother has lived through, to empathize better with her, and to give her more of what she actually needs from me because suddenly I need a portion of that for myself. I've had moments of gratitude for systems of support that I've never trusted enough to lean on (an issue of my own, not those within the support system) holding me up when suddenly I genuinely *had* to give a little. Gratitude also for what I can do, appreciating those things all the more for recognizing that there will be days when maybe I can't do what I would have liked. Gratitude for the recognition that things could be so, so very much worse, and gratitude for the perspective that health-matters have provided, that I've grown past getting upset over the little things, and the version of me who has this awareness is someone I believe I like a fair bit more than the version of me who did not.

It's a weird thing to find gratitude in illness, but a tremendously helpful one. Thank you to all who have participated in this for inspiring me to do so.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on August 24, 2015, 12:27:28 pm
Em Hotep Saryt,

Your experiences in matters of health are similar to my own. While not directly the same as yourself, looking back on it now has given me the opportunity to fully appreciate the issues women have surrounding their health, their reproductive health and the loss of materials that surround that.

The similarity, however, is in the loss of control that people with chronic or re-occuring illness face, along with those that require a major surgery; you are in essence getting to know your body all over again, and learning is at a later stage in the game is often far more frustrating than early on. But you are very right in the fact that the gratitude can and does come from having systems of support, but also in the understanding that you are not alone.

Thank you for sharing your experiences with us.

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Ematsen on August 24, 2015, 09:49:56 pm
What I've noticed in the past I've noticed even more starkly this last week - the lack of gratitude I get in return for anything. (Honestly I feel bad talking about this because I have a feeling it's not what you're going for here; and it's fine to tell me if that's so.)
This is a recurring problem that I have at home with my biological family, and with my chosen family as of late. Nothing is good enough or right enough and no matter how big it is, there is no gratitude. There's rarely even acknowledgement, and often that comes with conditions. An example being that my grandfather's office had not been touched or cleaned since he passed away 8 years ago and was becoming a junk room. A family member had been talking about wanting to clean it out - so I did it. I cleaned the whole thing out, bought organizers, put loose things in storage boxes and labelled them all neatly.
But there wasn't a single word of thanks - only complaints about the boxes, how I've made everything worse, and "well that's nice, BUT..."

and this happens all the time. Every day. Even with small things, it starts to build up. Is it wrong to be so upset that I'm not being shown gratitude, even when I'm trying extra hard to be grateful for the things they do for me?
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on August 24, 2015, 11:55:48 pm
Em Hotep Ematsen,

It sounds like you're in a difficult situation, and I can't provide you with many answers. The only thing I can do is ask: Are you doing these nice things because you're expecting the gratitude? Or are you doing them because they need to be done/ you want to do them? I'm not asking these questions to be mean or to start a fight, but they are questions that need to be asked.

If they are complaining, Its not wrong to ask why. Perhaps, in the case of your grandfather's room-turned-storage, the person who originally offered wanted to do it because it was a way for them to find closure with your grandfather's passing, and you doing the cleaning basically removed that choice for them?
If this is the case, what other things are you doing for people that they want to be doing themselves?

A case in point: Working with older people takes a bit of understanding in how they operate. Older people often experience a lack of control; in their health, in their choice of living arrangements, in who they see or what they do. When I work with them, I make sure to give them choices, ones that they can control. For example, offering them a choice to sit by the window or at the edge of their bed for a meal, or letting them pick out what clothing they wear for the day. Giving them that form of control helps give them a sense of dignity, involvement and value.

If you do everything for people, are they learning? Are they feeling involved in the process?

Also, what does doing everything for them really do for you? Does it pull you in many different directions? If it brings you no joy to do it, then why are you doing it?

If you're wanting to do something because it needs to be done, then let go of the need for gratitude. It may or may not happen. That's a risk you take when you do things for people. Not everyone is thankful, and not everyone will offer you their gratitude.

If they don't offer gratitude, then it might be helpful to ask why. What's the situation? Can you step back and look at it objectively and without bias? If not, then you're probably going to continue getting frustrated and eventually burn out.

When they say "Its not right", it may also mean "Its not the way -I- would do it.", which is a different issue all together.

Lastly, some people are never happy. No matter what you do.

Senebty.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on August 27, 2015, 12:59:20 pm
Em Hotep everyone,

Ematsen brings up a very good point I would like to touch on today; What do you do when you do not get the Gratitude that you were expecting?

Firstly, its important to bring it up with the person. Talk to them about it. Express your feelings about why you are hurt.

Some folks would go the other route, to loudly express the words "You're welcome" when someone hasn't said thank you. This is also a common response when someone does express thanks. There have been suggestions, though, that saying "You're Welcome" is actually not as good as we originally thought. Instead, there are folks suggesting an alternative statement of:

"I know you'd do the same for me."

Its interesting to note those words, as not only does it accept the gift of the thank you that is offered, it also acknowledges that a person would do the same for you if they were in that situation. It creates a feeling of reciprocity, and establishes a relationship between two people. It indicates that neither of you are keeping score, or keeping tabs on who owes who what, but that you are both comfortable with a give and take that is present in a relationship.

It might also be helpful to ask people to pay the kinds forward if you're still bent on keeping tabs of who owes what to whom. This business of owing people doesn't normally fit into a conversation on gratitude mind you, as the purpose of doing things should not be to expect a "thank you". You should be doing things for people because:
A) They asked for your help, or
B) You genuinely want to help them.

Sometimes gratitude does require an attitude adjustment on our parts as much as it does to other people.

If people are consistently neglecting the "Thank you" when you do things for them, it might be time to stop doing those specific things, and divert your attention to someone or something that will appreciate it.

Anyway, some food for though, and thank you, Ematsen, for getting that conversation started.

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Ematsen on August 27, 2015, 10:30:06 pm
Reverend, I appreciate how kind and thought-out your responses are. I've been in a yucky mental/emotional state the last few weeks because of family issues and an upsetting break-up, and I truly appreciate how compassionately you responded to my snotty whining.
The things I have been doing, I don't do them just to receive the gratitude, though I took a few steps back to really assess that and make sure. I do them because even though my family isn't the most supportive, they're my family and it's the right thing to do. I also enjoy the personal satisfaction I get from doing things/fixing things/etc. I just have felt very unappreciated in ALL aspects of my life recently and I couldn't find another way to express it other than, well...whining about it on the internet. :p
I'll be doing some thinking on your latest post, too, and to end this on a happy note: I am very grateful for my friend and soul-sister Heqaiitw, who's stuck with me and supported me through some really tough stuff. She deserves all the thank-you's I could ever say.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on August 28, 2015, 02:05:10 pm
Em Hotep Ematsen,

You're a sibling of the Faith, and I am always working towards kindness. Thank you for taking the time to express yourself, and taking the time to explain things a little further. We all need a chance to vent every now and again, and I've found some studies that show that venting in a healthy way is actually good for us. The reason why is because it forces you to put your feelings into words. Sort of the same reason we express gratitude; by putting feelings into words. Its a form of heka, so to speak of the things bothering you is also a way to deal with them. Putting them to words makes them more manageable, and helps you break them down to figure out how to deal with them.

I am sorry that things are rough for you, and glad that you have support with Heqaiitw. Its good that you are able to step back from things to examine and re-examine where they sit in your life. That's a great skill.

Lastly, don't forget to give yourself some kindness too, ok? Its probably one of the hardest things to do, but it can very much be one of the most rewarding.

If you need to talk more, my inbox and email is always open, and my office hours are usually announced in the Shoutbox and on the Reverend Office Hours thread.

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on August 31, 2015, 09:32:17 am
Em Hotep,

The frog is not the most awake at the moment, so this post may end up rambling more often than not. Still, I have tea in hand (which I am thankful for) and I have ideas brewing in the back of my mind.

But first, I wanted to check in with all of you. How has your week been? Have you been given some opportunities to share gratitude? Would you like to share those moments?

For me, I do have a gratitude moment, which happened yesterday as my partner (Khufu) and I were driving around.

We are planning on hitting up the Minnesota Renaissance Festival again this year, and we have been talking about potentially going to Burning Man and what that would entail. While we've both done little research on the issue of Burning Man, the discussion around our previous vacations together prompted me to check in with him, as I always want to be a good travel partner with him.

He did mention to me that doing anything by flight tends to make him a little dopey and stressed out, and he has a hard time focusing on things because his mind is in multiple locations. This was actually an epiphany moment for me, as I hadn't realized that he goes through much of the same issue I do when flying. I tend to feel slightly off after a flight, despite the lack of time difference between some destinations.

We both agreed that driving was the best option if we were to do Burning Man, also because of the nature of that event in terms of its manifesto on leaving no trace behind you save for your foot prints.

This discussion made me realize how important it is when in a partnership, to check in with the other, to make sure you're both on the same page, to make sure that if one of you is having a difficult time, that the other can help pick up some of that slack until the recovery is finished. I am very thankful that I have such a good partnership with Khufu, and that we are able to talk out issues before they get too big.... unless my hormones are being evil. ;)

How about you? Can you recall anyone in your life that you have had this profound level of trust and thankfulness for? Can you recall something that they have done for you? Can you recall what you have done for them?

In the next few days, I am going to post a project, and am early awaiting to see what the results of said project is!

Have a great week everyone!

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on September 03, 2015, 09:34:03 am
Em Hotep everyone,

Today marks a challenge for you.

Today, I want you to pick one person in your life. Can be as near or as far from you as you like. Within the temple, within your family, within your friend, within your community. Pick someone. Anyone.

Got that person in mind? Good.

Send them a thank you card.

It can be a thank you for pretty much anything. Thanks for being my friend, thanks for helping me out with that project, thanks for lending me some spare change, thanks for giving me a ride home from the hospital, thanks for listening to me when I wasn't feeling well. Anything.

Just pick someone and send them a Thank you card.

"But Rev. Maret," you ask. "Where do I get a thank you card from?"

Excellent question. You can get them pretty much anywhere. The caveat is that is must be sent physically. No email thank you.
Most Hallmark stores or card stores of any sort sell cards. Craft stores sell card blanks. Some computer programs like Pages or Open Office, allow you to make and print your own cards (and I'm sure there are places online to do that too). You could even go as far as making your own cards if you're artistically inclined. But like I said, it must be a physically mailed or sent card. No email. No e-cards.

There is a method to my madness, I swear.

So, once you have done this, please feeler to post your experiences here. Who did you send it to? Why did you send it? How did it make you feel? How did it make them feel? Did they send you something back? Do you feel closer or farther in your relationship with them? Is there anything else not covered here that you can add?

Have a fantastic week-end!

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on September 09, 2015, 09:12:58 am
Em Hotep everyone,

Today I wanted to talk about Gratitude vs. Entitlement.

Often these things are confused and confounded, and I think that Entitlement needs to be discussed in relation to Gratitude.

Firstly, let's look at the differences between the two. In a nut-shell:
1. Gratitude= Thankfulness for what you do have, and
2. Entitlement= resentment for what you DON'T have.
Gratitude also deals with our ego and humbles us, while Entitlement is nothing but ego based.

Entitlement blinds us to our own journey, and our own unique situations. It is also particularly harmful to the self in that it creates a false sense of expectations and goals. IE: You just start working out with the expectation that you’re going to look like this buff, slim and toned mega star within six months to a year/ Having to get married, have kids, a house, a car and a white picket fence AKA “Keeping up with the Jones’ “ because all your friends have done so. Gratitude can help you see how far you have come, not how much farther you have to go on your journey. It also allows you to take real stock in what has or hasn’t been done. Entitlement only focuses on what hasn’t been done, and can be profoundly negative.

Gratitude creates a sense of value, while Entitlement does not. When we feel devalued because our gratitude is not acknowledged, it borders on the realm of Entitlement. IE: I did X, so I deserve X in response. So, feeling thankful adds value, which in turn creates positive effects in the world.

Entitlement means we also take things for granted, and that we expect people to do things for us. Giving a gift to someone who expects it devalues the gift before we give it, which also breeds the resentment necessary for Entitlement.

Its OK and natural to want to improve things, but using gratitude to help snowball change is more appropriate than using entitlement.
It is helpful to understand the difference between “Want” and “Need”, and be able to apply those into situations where you can have gratitude. IE: You want a new shiny thing, but down the road, you need to have your rent and bills paid. Unless you have set aside money for the shiny new thing, make sure you have the bills paid first. Gratitude comes in play with “I’m glad I have the bills paid off this month, it means I can set aside money for the shiny thing I want for later.”
Like ‘taking’ and ‘receiving’: 'To take' means that you feel entitled to it and that you have a right to demand it, while to give means that you acknowledge that it comes from someone else and is being given as a gift to you.

Gratitude focuses on the present, while Entitlement fixes the mind and emotions on the past and future. Being present and in the moment always us to be fully present for someone or something, which is the gift you give in response to gratitude.

Gratitude facilitates learning. It allows us to see what we need to see in order to learn from the experience. It helps us think of new strategies to challenges and situations, and it allows us to see the learning experience potential. All three of these things therefor can prompt a shift in mind and help us real with the situation at hand.

Some food for thought for the day.

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on September 25, 2015, 11:09:35 am
Em Hotep Children of Netjer,

I'd like to extend to you the opportunity to do something of a Gratitude Heka during your senut time, or when you do your own personal rites of devotion. When you get to the individual prayer portion for senut, or during any time you feel appropriate during your personal devotions, instead of asking for this, that and the next thing, try instead offering your prayers of gratitude for the things in your life. Write them out before hand if you need to, but do speak them out loud. There is a reason for this, I promise.

When you do this, I encourage all of you to share your experiences here, if you feel comfortable doing so. I like to engage in discussion, and add new perspectives other than my own.

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on September 29, 2015, 11:47:11 am
Em Hotep everyone,

Something came up today during my daily meditation in shrine. I was quietly pondering what things I could have gratitude towards today, and I remembered someone asking what to do when the person you are grateful for won't accept that gratitude. I may have figured out a partial answer, which I will share with you here.

Today's message to me, meant to be shared with all of you, was simply this:
I am thankful for the people I don't necessarily get along with, because they show me a better way to do something.

It can be very difficult to give out gratitude towards the people that we have personality clashes with, but keep in mind, they are there to teach you something; about how you said/did something, about how you might think of something, about how you do (x). It is a challenge to you to figure out a better way to do something, so as to reduce the clash.

There is a great deal of talk these days about how everyone and their dog is offended, and the message that is commonly repeated is "You cannot change people's reactions to things, you can only change how you respond."

If you are in a clash with someone, stop and take a moment to figure out why they are upset. Be thankful that they are taking moment, weather they know it or not, to teach you something about themselves and about you.

Some more food for thought.

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on October 11, 2015, 10:19:58 am
Em Hotep everyone!

Me being Canadian, we are about to have our Thanksgiving holiday on October 12th. This got me thinking that now is the perfect time to post; not only in celebration with my fellow Canadians, but also to get the Gratitude train rolling again.

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I'm going to post five things that I am grateful for, and I encourage all of you to do the same thing!

Things I am thankful for:
1. I am thankful for the people who encourage me daily, and who call on me when they see my skills and abilities.
2. I am thankful for meaningful discussions with friends and family. For all the good times, I also enjoy more serious and esoteric discussions as well.
3. I am thankful for my creativity, and the ability to express it in meaningful ways to me.
4. I am thankful for my faith. It sustains me when things are going poorly, and it gives me the opportunity to become a better person through self-knowledge.
5. I am thankful for my Faith Community. Without it, I would be a single person by myself, and I know I flourish when I have others of like mind to talk to, and participate in faith activities with. I never understood how important it was to have a community within faith until I found it here.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on October 15, 2015, 01:28:10 pm
Em Hotep everyone!

I'm going to do another quick "5 things I am grateful for", not for the lack of anything else to talk about, but more to encourage all of you to do the same thing.

Today I am thankful for:
1. Medical coverage. Even though my benefits plan is currently on hold, it is only on hold because the Province I live in has a drug plan where my medication will be 100% covered.
2. Having a partner who understands when I am irritated and how to calm me down when I get angry. I admit I was at a point of frustration working on a portion of my cosplay, and he was able to listen to me vent my frustration and offer a new perspective.
3. I am thankful for the work I have put in at the University. While I was able to get my Advanced Major for my undergraduate degree, my hard work in terms of teaching and being a grader/ marker also paid off outside the University in terms of recommendations for further work. The professor I work for always recommends me to others, and sings my praises enough to make me blush.
4. D&D. Yes, I know this one sounds strange, but there is a reason for it. Watching others play D&D (Dungeons and Dragons for those not familiar) inspires me and gives me the boost of creativity, and playing it allows me to get together with like-minded friends for company plus skill-and-strategy development. It challenges me mentally, which is important to me.
5. Ptah. Because I just made the connection today. He is also known as "The Builder", and when I am making things with thermoplastics, I often refer to it as building. Actually, usually anyone who works in cosplay with materials like thermoplastics, resin casting or Pepakura files calls it building. He's the one that keeps the majority of my cosplays in an ever growing state of improvement.

So what five things are you grateful for today?

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Tjesi on October 15, 2015, 08:59:44 pm
I am grateful for

1. My job. I love what I do even when I have to do the less exciting parts.

2. My supervisor. Who is one of the smartest people I know. When he says he is impressed by me, I boggle.

3. My support network. Friends, doctors, coaches all give me room to grow and a new perspective on life.

4. My boyfriend (also part of #3). I have learned to say what I feel, even when it scares me. He listens and responds thoughtfully. 

5. My home. It's still in chaos after the renovation. But it's a haven and I love it.

Thank you again, Rev. Maretemheqat.


=======
Awibemhethert
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on October 16, 2015, 10:56:49 am
Em Hotep Ibi!

These are wonderful things to be grateful for, and thank you for sharing them with us all! I really love #4. Its encouraging to know that you both have a relationship that is built on mutual trust and respect where you can share your feelings honestly, and not be made to feel ashamed for them.

As they say in the song, That's amore! :D

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Ha'autmuti on October 17, 2015, 03:23:10 am
I am thankful for:

1) My Gods being incredibly patient with me.

2) My loved ones understanding how hard I'm working right now and going out of their way to help me however they can.

3) My director and stage management mentor trusting me and working with me to make up for the things I missed by oversleeping this morning.

4) Warm blankets and money to pay for heating.

5) My therapist, psychiatrist, and primary care doctor, who have done so much for me and made things so much easier than they might have otherwise been. Whenever I hear about friends having bad experiences with mental healthcare in particular, I just wish I could clone mini versions of them to send to people in need. They are great and they are so much of the reason why I've gotten as far as I have.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Sema'a on October 17, 2015, 06:46:54 am
I am grateful for:

1) The relationship I have with my gods. 

2) My husband, who greeted me with a roast chicken, macaroni and cheese, steamed veggies and a bottle of wine when I got home.

3) The community of friends I have in my daily life.

4) The positive environments in which I am learning the skills for my counseling career.

5) The loveliness of autumn.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on October 17, 2015, 10:37:16 am
Ha'aut and Sobeq,

Thank you for participating and sharing the things you are grateful for! These are some pretty powerful things, and revolve around your relationships with others. Hopefully your gratitude feeds into these communities in which you are involved, and helps make things more positive. :D

Nekhtet!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Ihhyensenu on October 17, 2015, 07:26:24 pm
Em hotep,

I'm thankful for

1. My faith. The community, and my relationship with the Gods.

2. My Husband, a strong headed Irishman, but is there for me through everything.

3. My support network, friends, family.

4. My Job, i love what i do.

5. A roof over my head and food in my belly.

In regards to the thank you card "challenge" I actually have a good friend coming in from Australia and i have a little care package for her. Its been 13 years since i have seen her in person. Its going to be a great week!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on October 18, 2015, 12:08:49 am
Em Hotep Hetepenamen,

Sounds perfect! Like a little welcome/care/gratitude package all rolled into one!

Let us know what the reaction is when your friend gets it! :D

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Remenit on October 18, 2015, 01:14:36 pm
Em Hotep,

Today, I am thankful for:

1) My job, and that it's more interesting than sitting in a desk all day like other members of my team. I'm the one that gets to travel between sites and see people.

2) Being in a position where I can easily smile again. For the longest of times, I couldn't. Even as far as a few years back, I didn't think I'd be able to. Now I can. :-)

3) My faith, even if that's ending up putting a lot more work on my plate ;-)

4) My success in my research, and the boost of confidence it's giving me, let alone the avenues it's opening up.

5) My bed. :-) I'm travelling a lot, and it's exhausting, and more often then not I'm staying in hotel beds. Returning to your own, and getting in to that position that's just right? Nothing like it.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on October 19, 2015, 09:23:04 am

5) My bed. :-) I'm travelling a lot, and it's exhausting, and more often then not I'm staying in hotel beds. Returning to your own, and getting in to that position that's just right? Nothing like it.

Em Hotep,

Quoted for truth!

I remember when I had my multiple surgeries, I couldn't wait to get home to my bed. It was the most comfortable thing in the world. Day surgery hospital gurneys are not the most inviting things in the world. :/

Thank you for sharing Rev. Nesyut!

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Ihhyensenu on October 19, 2015, 10:46:59 pm
Em Hotep Hetepenamen,

Sounds perfect! Like a little welcome/care/gratitude package all rolled into one!

Let us know what the reaction is when your friend gets it! :D

Senebty!

Em Hotep,

My friend arrived today and loved the little care package I got her. She gave my chocolate. I call it a win/win.

I try to make it a point when i have guests over, that my house is theirs. I have a small basket of sample soaps and such set aside or long staying guests. Its a nice feeling to know that the basic needs are considered.

Have a great week!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Ludna on October 20, 2015, 04:22:12 am
My daily gratitude for today:

1) I'm grateful for the Gods, that understand me and listen to me even if my faith lately is not so strong as it used to be.

2) My new life in a foreign country

3) My family and friends, who support me and love me in my home country.

4) My little family abroad: my boyfriend and my furry baby, who enlighten my days.

5) My pagan Sisterhood in the UK, stronger than ever despite the losses we had.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on October 20, 2015, 08:29:43 pm
Em Hotep Hetepamen and Ludna!

Thank you both for sharing your "5 Things to be Grateful for", and the follow-up to the Welcome package!

I love the idea of little soaps and shampoos when visiting a friend for an extended period. We have a little "Emergency Mommy Care Package" for Mothers who find themselves unexpectedly in our NICU from Out-of-Province or long-distance. They're filled with soaps, shampoos, pads, breast pads, toothpaste, travel toothbrush and a few other things too.

Ludna,

Moving to a new place is tough as it is. I can't imagine moving to an entirely new country! Seems like you have the necessary supports in place, which is so important. I think its important to acknowledge when your faith might be a little on the rocks when times are tough, but counting gratitude is actually a good way to help deal with that. :)

Many prayers for you!

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Ludna on October 21, 2015, 05:07:13 am

Ludna,

Moving to a new place is tough as it is. I can't imagine moving to an entirely new country! Seems like you have the necessary supports in place, which is so important. I think its important to acknowledge when your faith might be a little on the rocks when times are tough, but counting gratitude is actually a good way to help deal with that. :)

Many prayers for you!

Senebty!

Thank you so much, Maretemheqat, for the kind words. It has been quite hard for me, as I love travelling but I used to have deep roots back in my country. At the beginning I had to face loneliness and learnt how to face my demons but now I am ok :) I know that I am loved.
I am pretty confident my faith will grow stronger again when I'll settle down. I'll keep talking to the Gods and gratitude, maybe I cannot hear Them but definitely They can hear me.

Senebty

Ludna
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on October 21, 2015, 05:36:51 pm
Thank you so much, Maretemheqat, for the kind words. It has been quite hard for me, as I love travelling but I used to have deep roots back in my country. At the beginning I had to face loneliness and learnt how to face my demons but now I am ok :) I know that I am loved.
I am pretty confident my faith will grow stronger again when I'll settle down. I'll keep talking to the Gods and gratitude, maybe I cannot hear Them but definitely They can hear me.

Senebty

Ludna

Em Hotep Ludna!

Rev. Maret is fine. I know my shemsu name can be a mouthful. :)

Yes, I think the Gods do hear us when we speak to them of gratitude, or gratitude we might have for Them. I think different Gods will express Their reciprocation of that gratitude in ways that are unique to Them and us. *Nods*

After all, we've taken the time to establish a relationship with Them, and They with us.

Senebty, and thank you for sharing!

~Rev. Maret
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on October 24, 2015, 06:33:13 pm
Em Hotep everyone,

Its the week before Halloween, and I have a five point list of things I am thankful for.

1. Pumpkins. Yes, really. They're a wonderful bonding tool with family and friends.

2. Costume searching/ making. Also another excellent bonding tool, but a good way to show resourcefulness and creativity. I love watching people and going shopping with them to see how their heads work.

3. Halloween candy. Makes for perfect offering sizes.

4. Cooler temperatures. Not freezing, but enough where a person can be comfortable in a sweater and a scarf for a walk.

5. Halloween. While there is some very spiritual significance with the holiday for those of us with pagan leanings, it is also a great way to spend time with family and friends.

What about you? Do you have any Halloween gratitude?

Senebty!
~Rev. Maret
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Ihhyensenu on October 26, 2015, 12:49:32 am
Em Hotep,

I LOVE Halloween. we have a pumpkin, i dress up my workstation, costumes, candy, and of course a few Tricks, along w/ treats.

Thankful for-

1. cooler temps
2. fall colors- we live close enough to the city with access to the mountains, Its beautiful here.
3. Family time
4. Pumpkin pie ( don't judge me ;) )
5. trick/treating with friends and kids.

I usually do a countdown to Halloween; spooky quotes, movie clips, etc... but I've been lacking the past few years. Regardless, its still my favorite time of year.

Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Ludna on October 26, 2015, 04:27:54 am
Being a pagan and a goth, I LOVE Halloween (or I should call it Samhain). I do practice in a Wicca coven as well, and Samhain is the time of the year when connection with your Ancestors is stronger than usual. So it is a very important festival, that marks the triumph of the darkness and the winter approaching.

1 - I am grateful for my Ancestors, they are always here for me and I feel them even closer lately.

2 - Love Autumn colours, I am lucky enough to live in countryside and close to a forest and witness all the wonderful sceneries that Nature is offering.

3- Love all the spooky stuff, Halloween is like my Christmas so this of the year my boyfriend patiently allow me to watch all the horror films I want and re-watch all the Tim Burton films :)

4 - I love to dress up, definitely. Look forward to have fancy dress party!  8)

5 - Love the atmosphere of these days, also because we do remember we are mortal after all.

Senebty,

Ludna
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on October 26, 2015, 06:07:21 pm
Em Hotep,

I LOVE Halloween. we have a pumpkin, i dress up my workstation, costumes, candy, and of course a few Tricks, along w/ treats.

Thankful for-

1. cooler temps
2. fall colors- we live close enough to the city with access to the mountains, Its beautiful here.
3. Family time
4. Pumpkin pie ( don't judge me ;) )
5. trick/treating with friends and kids.

I usually do a countdown to Halloween; spooky quotes, movie clips, etc... but I've been lacking the past few years. Regardless, its still my favorite time of year.



Em Hotep Hetepenamen,

I JUDGE THEE WORTHY! *ahems*

Translation: I love pumpkin pie too. My mother makes hers from scratch, and she usually has to make an extra pie for me, because I will eat an entire pumpkin pie unto myself if left un-attended.

Thanks for sharing!

Senebty!
~Rev. Maret
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Ihhyensenu on October 27, 2015, 12:05:41 pm


Em Hotep Hetepenamen,

I JUDGE THEE WORTHY! *ahems*

Translation: I love pumpkin pie too. My mother makes hers from scratch, and she usually has tomato an extra pie for me, because I will eat an entire pumpkin pie unto myself if left un-attended.

Thanks for sharing!

Senebty!
~Rev. Maret
[/quote]

Em Hotep,

I'm feeling the love here. :)

We used to make our own pies from scratch. But life, i now buy one from the store for parties and then make one at home. So if i mess up the crust or whatever, i only have myself to blame.

The newest tradition is experimenting with stuffing/dressing. So far we have 10 different versions! our friends have an open invititation to thanksgiving every year. They are amazing people and have definately felt the karma kick back ( or whatever the KO equivalvent may be)

Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on November 02, 2015, 11:57:46 am
Em Hotep everyone,

Today's discussion/ thoughts on gratitude are prompted by a slightly un-usual set of circumstances. Today's discussion will focus on past relationships, and how to find the gratitude when they're over.

I was at a convention all week-end, and there were two situations in which I found myself having to give pause and think, to examine where, in a really crappy situation, I could have gratitude. This was prompted by the fact that a photograph surfaced that contained one of my ex-boyfriends.

A few years ago, this man and I were dating. We had dated for several years, were living together at one point. There came a day, however, the our relationship fell apart, and in a rather dramatic fashion, we parted ways. We kept in touch for maybe a month or two afterwards, if only because I was still afraid of letting him go completely and being truly alone for the first time in my life.
I learned later that he had been seeing another woman behind my back, and for years, I was angry with him. Not just angry; seething, burning hatred and rage. I swallowed me heart several times on seeing photos of him, or when someone would mention his name around me. Friends tried their best to comfort me, in massive amounts of alcohol, one night stands and the 'new found liberation into singles territory".

I eventually found someone else shortly after that relationship had ended, and was with this man for 8 years. This relationship ended badly too, with just as much drama.

At the time, I could not see this situation for what it really was; a learning point, and a point of growth for me to take ahold of and help nurture. When the sting wasn't quite as bad and fresh, I was able to sit back and reflect on what had happened with an objective mindset, and really examine what it was that made this situation as volatile as it had become.

Now we come to this week-end, in seeing the photos of my ex and having little to no reaction at all. In the past, I'd spit nails and venom. This time, there was simply no emotion at all.

Now I'm sure you're asking yourself how I in the world am I grateful for this?

The answer is simple...and complicated.

I have reached a point in my life where I understand that events have shaped who I am; both the bad and the good. They have taught me lessons I needed to know about myself, and during a discussion with someone on the week-end, I repeated myself several times; "We do our best learning from failure."

I failed in those relationships, yes. But they also taught me more about myself and my needs, as well as what I could have been doing better in the relationship. I am thankful for this, because without it, I would not have learned those lessons, as painful as they were.

Reflecting on your own personal lives, do you have someone(s) in your past relationships where they have ended poorly? Or just ended? Can you reflect on those situations now? What are your observations? What are your feelings? Why do you feel those things? What are you learning from this experience?

This one is a particularly hard one to talk about, I know. Just know that if you decide to talk about it or not, I'm thinking of you so that you can have the strength to tackle this particular gratitude session.

Much Love,
~Rev. Maret
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Tjesi on November 02, 2015, 02:08:41 pm
Em hotep, Rev. Maret.

This is a tough subject. I have had three relationships in my life.

The first was with a married man. I didn't know when the relationship started that he was married. "I'm separated," he said. But he wasn't. He also wanted to change who I was. I was a young, malleable thing and he was going to "My Fair Lady" me. I ended the relationship. After more time than I wish I had. I regret having let it go on as long as it did. And didn't understand when he called me years later to tell me that one of his friends had died. I had little or no sympathy. Looking at it now from the point of what gratitude I have for that relationship.... it taught me, to some extent, not to let go of who I am and what I believe in. It's never easy for me to express my needs and desires, but now I struggle through the fear to ask for what I need and I'm even coming to respect my needs and feelings. I have also learned to feel compassion for him. Not that I have interacted with him for many years.

My second relationship was with someone who was newly divorced. We ended up moving in together. I moved 800 miles to live with him. And after 4 or 5 years he admitted that what he really wanted was to get back together with his ex-wife. I have gratitude that I didn't go ballistic. I didn't fight over each piece of furniture or possessions trying to punish him in this manner. I still felt it had been worth trying to have a relationship with him... better to take the risk than to not being willing to try. I could see my own flaws in the relationship. Oh, I was crushed. I cried rivers, but I knew, in my heart, that it hadn't been a great relationship.

Now I am in a relationship with someone who lives not only on the other side of the continent from me, but in another country. As well as the fact that he is considerably younger than I am. Yet, I'm not sure I'm willing to commit more time to a local relationship. This person is kind and expects me to be myself, and even more mind boggling to me, likes who I am even with my flaws and issues.

And I am grateful for all of these relationships. For the first, that I learned I wasn't willing to give up who I am for another. For the second, that I tried even though we both failed, and third that I have experienced acceptance and love of who I am in truth.

Thank you Rev. Maret.

Senebty,

Ibi
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on November 03, 2015, 08:33:59 am
Em Hotep Ibi,

Tough indeed, but you have the strength, despite any set backs you've had. Thank you for taking the time to talk about your experiences, and the learning within them.

Sometimes the most difficult thing to do within a relationships is to know when to let it go. I know my last relationship, I let things go on longer than perhaps they should have. I did have new experiences within that relationship, in that I tried everything to save it. I tried couples counselling in the hopes that both of our issues could be worked out.

I was very angry then, and felt very unloved and unwanted because my partner refused to deal with some of his medical issues. I learned in that relationship that I wanted a partner, not someone who I had to treat like a child and watch after every waking moment. I also wanted someone who had enough self-confidence to let me do my own thing without gas-lighting me or trying to make me feel guilty for enjoying myself without him. There was a great deal of communication break-down, despite trying to keep those lines open.

Thank you for continuing the discussion Ibi.

Senebty,
~Rev. Maret
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on November 05, 2015, 03:11:49 pm
Em Hotep everyone,

I wanted to start a discussion today on gratitude in situations of loss; specifically the loss of a loved one. Because we will soon be entering into the Mysteries of Wesir, I thought it important to begin the discussion on this topic in order to give people the chance for reflection and work up the courage to post if necessary.

Weather your loss is someone directly related to you (parent, child, sibling, grand parent, aunts and uncles, etc) or part of your extended network of friends and acquaintances, loss and grief are things that will affect and effect each of us in different ways. We each experience loss in different ways and the coping mechanisms of that loss are different for each person.

When a situation like this arises, it can be very, very difficult to see and have gratitude in these situations. It may be helpful to keep in mind that the gratitude you have does not necessarily have to come from where you think it will, like support systems and people, but in the recognition of the time you have spent with your loved one and the lessons and memories they have gifted you with.

In regards to the Wesir Mysteries, Aset and Nebt-het worked together to help prepare Wesir's body. They acknowledged their grief and suffering at His loss, but they were also able to see the good things Wesir had done in both life and death, and their relationship with their brother. Aset turned her focus to her child, Heru-sa-Aset, while Nebt-het turned her focus to ensuring that Wesir got to where he needed to go and ensured that her sister and nephew were cared for. Each expressed gratitude for the other, and each expressed the gratitude of the time they spent with Wesir.

Hopefully Their example can be of comfort to you during times of loss, and if you need someone else to talk to, my email and PM are always open.

This is a hard topic, and I understand fully if things are still too painful to express.

Much love to all of you, and senebty,
~Rev. Maret
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on November 12, 2015, 12:21:30 pm
Em Hotep everyone,

Today's gratitude discussion revolves around Veteran's Day (In the US) and Remembrance Day (In Canada, the UK, Australia and a few other European countries).

War is never an easy subject. Depending on the outcome of said war, there can still be a great deal of animosity and hurt on all sides. When there is conflict between countries, it is usually the people who suffer in those situations. Often times, it is soldiers that suffer the most.

Individual soliders, depending on their opinions of the war and the reason for entering it, rarely, if ever, have the option of saying no to deployment. World War 1 had the largest casualty and death toll rate of both world wars on both sides (Axis/ Central and Allied). For Allied forces, the estimated total is 5,153,604 to 6,431,799, and for Central Powers, the estimated total is 3,386,200 to 4,390,544 (According to Wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_War_I_casualties).

You are probably asking yourself "How can you find gratitude in such a situation?"

When I was still a member of the armed forces, myself and my companions discussed at length what we would do if there was the declaration of war again on the scale of the first two. Almost unanimously, the answer was thus:

"I will fight, so others don't have to."

Win, or lose, I'm going to make a leap of faith and assume that most soldiers feel this way. They will fight, so others don't have to. This is where my gratitude comes in, not because someone else is willing to fight on my behalf, but because there are people out there who realize the sacrifice that will have to be made, and still do so anyway. Win, or lose. Allies, or Central/ Axis. And they pay the ultimate price. Survivors guilt, dismemberment, nightmares, trauma and inability to cope with civilian life.

I am thankful that I can give back to them, what they have given to me.

If you have not, go and talk to your veterans. Go and talk to your soldiers who have survived war; from World War 1 to modern conflicts in Afghanistan. Talk to them. Hear them. Listen to their stories.

Do not avoid the dead. Speak to them too. They are just as deserving.

and say "Thank you for what you did for me."

Senebty.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on November 18, 2015, 12:12:26 pm
Em Hotep everyone,

Today's post on gratitude comes from an introspective place today, considering all that is going on in the world this last week.

Given the attacks on Paris, Beirut, Kenya, Syria and all other places affected by terrorist activity, it has very much brought out a great deal of divisiveness. Following swiftly on the heels of the Paris attack, renewed attention was given to the plight of Syrian refugees seeking a place within Canadian or US borders in order to escape what they've been forced to experience.

From the Canadian side of things; our Prime Minister has already promised to assist Syrian refugees, and has promised to bring at least 25,000 Refugees into Canada. This has, understandably, stirred up a great deal of debate. There are those in Canada that claim that Canada has enough of its own issues in dealing with Homelessness, Veterans issue, First Nations issues and more, and think it is poor policy to bring in Syrian refugees.

Looking over many of these comments to the effect of "WE DON'T WANT THEM HERE! EW! THEY'RE DIRTY AND NOT CHRISTIAN!", it made my heart sad. But then I began to look a little deeper. Many of these comments are based on ignorance and fear, of people not knowing or understanding what the process of Immigration is to a given country like the U.S. or Canada.

To that end, I took the time to look up the information through the Government of Canada's webpage, and read the information pertaining to many of the concerns being espoused by nay-sayers in regards to accepting refugees. Without going into too much detail (and boring you all to tears in the process), there is a far deal more that goes on in the process of Refugee settlement and Immigration than we realize.

Where do I have gratitude in this situation?

1. I am grateful that I have not had to experience the same situations that many refugees have had to experience. Between the original reasons they left their country of origin, to trying to get recognition with the United Nations, to finding a host or sponsor, to actually travelling to the Sponsor country, and THEN having to start life all over again in finding a job, schooling, medical exams, paperwork, housing, etc? Never mind if families are split up (which does happen) between different countries.

2. I am grateful for my education. This might seem odd placed here, but here's the reason why. My education, and I'd wager all post-secondary education, challenges us to look at the world around us and understand how to look at things critically, and then to research when we have things we do not understand. Education (or conversely, experience in a particular topic area) is the single most thing that helps to combat prejudice and ignorance, though we do have to be mindful of what is taught in regards to minorities and their experiences. The Ivory Tower is not immune to cracks at the foundation after all.

3. I am thankful for my work experience with new immigrants. I work with a tutoring program for new arrivals, and this has given me a direct understanding of the unique situations faced by new immigrants to this country. Many of them are profoundly thankful for the new start they have been given, but it is not without its own stress.

So those are my thoughts for the day. I would only follow up by saying if you have concerns about what's going on, look for reputable sources of information that can be applied to your situation.

Senebty and much love.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on November 25, 2015, 04:09:22 pm
Em Hotep to my American siblings of the Faith,

I know tomorrow is Thanksgiving for you, and many of you are travelling through various states in order to get home for the holidays. If you are not, I hope you have the opportunity to have a restful and meaningful holiday on your own, or with those whom you choose as your "family".

I just wanted to post a quick note to say thank you, to all of you, who have been participating in this thread, in this community, and in each others lives. We look out for one another in meaningful ways, and hopefully you'll get the opportunity to express that to one another.

Have a great holiday!

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on December 17, 2015, 06:47:44 pm
Em Hotep everyone,

It has been a while since I have posted anything here, mainly because life has gotten a touch body with the holidays around the corner, and with a recent death in my family.

Still, that, and the coming of the Establishment of the Celestial Cow holiday got me thinking about another aspect of gratitude, and that is in elements of supporting others.

I've begun to make efforts to hit the gym again, and it has been helpful to have others support and encourage my decision to do so. I was reminded in shrine the other day that none of us exists or operates in a vacuum, we all have elements of social need.

Just as Hethert shifted herself to become Nut to enable Ra to travel to the heavens, sometimes we need the help of others to help us reach our goals.

Has someone been there as a support for you, in order to help you reach your goals? Have you taken the time to thank them appropriately?

Something to mull over.

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on December 23, 2015, 11:44:05 am
Em Hotep Everyone,

Today's post is a mix of happy and sad. I make no apology for it, only because I think it does serve a wider purpose. If someone out there reading this begins to examine their lives and take these words to heart, then so much the better. Then I have accomplished what I set out to do.

I was watching M. Night Shayamalan's movie The Village the other day, which working on various items around my apartment. There is a scene in the opening of the movie, where one of the Village Elders takes the time to essentially perform "Grace" at a community shared meal. His Grace, however, consists only of the line:

"We are thankful for the time we have been given."

There are other, less obvious reasons to why he says the line, but it stuck a chord with me, and I have been mulling about what to post about in regards to this for a few days.

While I was doing so, a long time friend of the family passed away from cancer. He had been sick for a long time, and he did manage to live a bit longer than the doctors gave him in the end. Long enough, perhaps, to settle his affairs and ensure that everything was covered. I found out later, through the executor of his will, that he considered myself and my brothers like family.

The last time I saw him, was at Thanksgiving (Canadian) and then shortly after that for my birthday Dim-sum.

I suppose you're asking where on Geb's green belly am I supposed to be thankful for any of this.

I am thankful, for the time that I was given.

I am thankful for the time that I spent with him, for the ability to spend time with him, for the ability for him to be part of our family, as much as I was part of his. I am thankful for the "Bah Humbug" or "Hairy Mistress" I got this time of year, and I know I will miss those two statements. I am thankful for the times he made me laugh with his "crass" sense of humour. He reminded me not to take things too seriously when the situation called for it, but he was also very proud of me and my accomplishments, and never forget to tell me so.

I am thankful for the time that I was given.

Senebty.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Gezemyinepu on December 23, 2015, 08:31:44 pm
Em hotep, Maretemheqat- I'm so sorry to hear of this news. :(

I think it's amazing that you managed to put a positive spin on it however, in any way you could. I think that line from the film is great. It really resonates with me.

I posted before that my fiancee's father passed from end stage liver and kidney failure last year, and seeing what he was going through was so tough. My fiancee is indeed happy for the time he was given with him, however, no matter how bad it hurt.

Your post brought tears to my eyes, a really beautiful viewpoint to come of something so sad.

Happy Holidays and Senebty
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on December 28, 2015, 01:28:56 am
Em Hotep Everyone,

Let's do a Gratitude Check in. How are people doing since they've started to look at thinks from a position of gratitude? Has anyone noticed some differences in their attitude? In how they interact with people? Are you finding it easier to cultivate moments of gratitude, even when things are tough? Are you finding other things are easier (IE: Self-compassion) when you're able to engage in gratitude?

Lets get some discussion going. :)

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on January 03, 2016, 11:41:26 am
Em Hotep everyone!

Happy secular New Year! Usually around this time, many have avowed to make some changes in their lives in order to make things better. This is not an unknown concept to Kemetics either, though we know it more commonly as Zep Tepi.

The best thing about Zep Tepi is it means the chance to start again, the opportunity to change things for the better on any given day, in any given moment.

I have to say I am very thankful to have the opportunity to start again. Zep Tepi is always happening, and we can take advantage of it at anytime we wish.

So happy Zep Tepi to all of you.

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Meresinepu on January 03, 2016, 04:06:53 pm
Em hotep,

I am a firm believer in Zep Tepi.   The opportunity to start over again ...even if it means for me personally having to "start over" sometimes every day of that particular week, at least I have the chance to do it right and if I make a mistake to do it again, and again if necessary.  That perspective has really opened my eyes for a lot of things this last year.

I know that if I can't make it right I have tomorrow to try again until I do get it right.   

I am trying to teach my grandchildren this concept as well so that they know they don't have to beat themselves up for mistakes but they have the opportunity to do it again (and again if necessary) to get things right.   I don't want them thinking that they are losers if they don't get it the first time.

I think that this belief is something positive they can use in their everyday lives.  I think its worth teaching to our children :)  Thank you for letting me say that here :)

Senebty!


Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on January 04, 2016, 10:33:54 am
Em Hotep Meres,

I think its fantastic to teach children this concept. Getting things on the first try is nice and can be rewarding, but we as humans have the knack for learning more by failing. I think this unrealistic idea of attaining perfection the first time around can be dangerous in many ways, as it can set difficult to reach and unrealistic goals.

With Zep Tepi, I think its almost the same as the scientific process; where you develop a hypothesis and try the steps towards the conclusion you think will happen as a result. If you don't, you go back and learn what and where you went wrong, then try again, this time altering one or two steps in order to get the desired result.

Thank you so much for sharing!

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on January 05, 2016, 12:04:32 pm
Em Hotep everyone,

I'm looking to add another dimension to the Gratitude posts here, through the lens of self-compassion. While on the outset it essentially means being kind(er) to yourself, the process of self-compassion also means looking at our faults, flaws and destructive patterns, learning how to acknowledge them, and then moving past them.

Gratitude and self-compassion are linked, though they aren't mutually exclusive to one another. You can be self-compassionate without being grateful (and really, looking at the less-then-awesome aspects of ourselves can and will lead to moments where we will not be grateful), and you can be grateful without being self-compassionate (this involves judgement, which we do on an ongoing basis weather we realize it or not).

There are plenty of webpages, books, podcasts and videos on self-compassion. Recently I picked up a book called Self-Compassion: The proven power of being kind to yourself by Kristin Neff.

There are also books out there that include the psychological aspects of self-compassion and its beneficial effects.

Included here is a PDF file written by Kristin Neff on self-compassion as an important source of well-being. (http://self-compassion.org/wp-content/uploads/publications/Neff&Costigan.pdf)

Just some thoughts for the day. Remember to be kind to yourselves.

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on January 10, 2016, 01:55:00 pm
Em Hotep everyone,

Given my last post on Self-compassion, I wonder then if we are able to give ourselves gratitude for the things we do for and to ourselves? I imagine that its something not everyone does, in terms of having gratitude for themselves, but I think it might become a necessary thing.

We frequently are told to not pat ourselves on the back, even more so as a part of self-compassion. So when times are difficult, it would seem natural that we would give ourselves the necessary space to give ourselves the compassion we need. But what about when times aren't hard or difficult?

I am thankful for the times when my body has let me know when something was wrong, and I am grateful for the knowledge I have of my body to know when something is wrong. On even further reflection, I am grateful that my body is able to keep up with some of the physical strain I put it through. When I was more active, I was constantly pushing the limits of my endurance to get better, to have more stamina. I was able to see the link between the food I was eating and the stamina and endurance I had. That's...pretty amazing.

What about you? Do you have a moment where you can give gratitude to yourself? At something you did? Something you didn't do? Something you overcame? Something you achieved? Is there a way you can have gratitude for how you handled these things?

More thoughts!

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on February 05, 2016, 03:37:23 pm
Em Hotep everyone!

There are many holidays around the corner, both secular and religious. There are several festivals this month (Day of Making Health and Long Life on the 12th of February, Feast of Nut "Who Counts the Days" on the 16th, and Amun's Feast of Ra Entering the Sky on the 27th), as well as secular (Valentine's Day on the 14th, for us Canadians, the 15th is Louis Riel Day.)

I'd like to take a moment though to talk specifically about the Day of Making Health and Long Life, along with the intersection of Valentine's Day.

We all know what Valentine's Day is. It is a secular "holiday" where couples aim to be romantic with one another after a long, cold period of winter. Couples frequently give each other gifts such as chocolates, stuffed bears, hearts galore, and even children will exchange valentine's day cards with one another in school. There is a Christian content to St. Valentine's Day, in that an early martyr of the faith, who was a monk, was arrested and thrown in jail. He managed to convince his guard to secret love-letters to his beloved, who turned out to be the warden's daughter. When the warden found out, he executed Valentine.

The Day of Making Health and Long Life, is pretty straight forward too. It had both spiritual and physical connections, in that we do both physical and spiritual "cleaning" and making things healthy within ourselves. Making sure that we manage our health can be as simple as washing your hands before you eat, to making sure you have enough medication to manage your condition. It can mean taking time for ourselves in oder to check in with ourselves, and ensure that we are managing and healthy.

Given that these holidays are so close together, I imagine they can interconnect to give us an important teaching. Sometimes the best gift we can give to someone we love is to take care of ourselves. And for you single folks, the best gift you can give to yourself is self-love and self-care.

My gratitude for this is in the fact that my partner andI frequently check in with each other in the realm of emotional, mental and physical health. My partner took very good care of me when I had to go through my most recent surgeries, and in turn I have looked after him when he needed my care for an injury he sustained. We talk about our emotions and how we are feeling during situations, and we check in with each other when things are going well. If one of us is stressed out, we work towards helping the other manage those stress symptoms.

I am very grateful that I have a partner I can do this with, who shows me love in caring for himself, as much as I show him I love him by caring for myself.

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Gleb on February 09, 2016, 10:51:25 am
I gratitude every day in my heart. Sometimes it's hard for me to believe the Neteru are helping me, since i don't physically see everything. But I have had many signs they're on my side and if I need help, they'll be there for me.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on February 09, 2016, 11:02:21 am
Em Hotep Gleb!

The Netjeru are there for you, yes. Some people have a difficult time connecting with them, or don't have the same "God Phone" as others might have. And that's ok.

Just remember the clear signs they have given you, and remember that you are developing a relationship with them as well as they are developing a relationship with you. It takes time to get to know one another. :)

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on March 02, 2016, 09:23:23 pm
Em Hotep everyone!

How are you all doing? I know spring is just around the corner for many of us, and that usually means the beginning of a flurry of activity. Most of the time it is the dreaded SPING CLEANING!

Which is not entirely a bad thing, to be honest. I'm grateful when I am able to do deep cleans or spring cleans, for several reasons to be honest.

1. In our Faith, there is a direct relationship to cleanliness, purity and the Duat. If you and your space are clean, you are closer to purity, and closer to the Duat.

2. Spring cleaning allows us to take stock of the last few months, and look at things honestly. Have you seen those plethora of articles that crop up on the "Pitch It, Donate it or Hold onto It" organizational stuff? That's basically what Spring Cleaning does as well. It makes way for the incoming influx of new growth and creative energy, along with taking a serious and honest account of the last few months.

3. It forces us to drop the un-necessary weight of the winter we un-intentionally put on. Weight in all aspects; physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. Spring cleaning is a great time to begin to unpack those things, sort through them, and get rid of the excess weight that might be holding you back from moving forward. Winter is usually a season of barren inactivity, so when Spring is around the corner (Or the flood, in our case!), it is sometimes necessary to do a little pruning, self-care and preparation for the new growth.

What about you? Have you taken a moment to do some Spring Cleaning?

Senebty!
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on June 21, 2016, 09:51:01 pm
Em Hotep Everyone,

It has been a while since I last posted in this thread. I admit I have been fairly busy over the last while with a new job, expectations on entering into Graduate school, travel and other assorted adventures.

I wanted to post here to under to remind people about the process of gratitude as a learning tool. As stated near the beginning of this thread, Gratitude helps us to take account, see and appreciate the things we do have, rather than lamenting the loss of things we don't have. Gratitude can be as easy or as complex to cultivate as you wish, but its important to take a moment to pause and reflect on the things you do have as a component necessary for change.

Have you held a moment of gratitude recently? Have to taken pause to count the blessings you do have? If things are going poorly or are difficult, have you thought of something that you are thankful for in the midst of that chaos?

Try and do so now, and feel free to share those moments here.

Senebty!
~Rev. Mesetibes
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Anippe811 on June 24, 2016, 04:16:40 pm
Gratitude as a learning tool.

Gratitude is what has opened this new path for me, as I was searching for ways to thank Sekhmet for helping through a very chaotic time. She has watched over my friend, and her children, through me and I felt I should express my thanks in appropriate ways- such as setting up a shrine and leaving offerings for her.

Someone gave me flowers today to say thanks for helping out, and a hand made card which one of the children had made for me at school. When I was given the flowers and card they didn't just say thanks, but the little boy said 'thank you because you love me.' Made me tear up. It was very lovely. Pure, simple gratitude for being there. (And I thanked them too, not just in the robotic automatic "thanks but there was no need", but made a point of saying that the flowers were beautiful, and that I could see that he had taken great effort to make my picture).

I shall keep thinking about and practise gratitude further over the coming days.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Anippe811 on June 27, 2016, 03:55:44 pm
As kindness and compassion have been very important to me all my life, I have taken tome to reflect on most of the points in this thread over the last few days.

I will try to list 5 things I am grateful for to share what my reflections have highlighted for me.

1- Thank you Rev. Maret for all your pointers and guidance. And also many thanks to those Gods who have manifested themselves and shown me this new path in my life.

2- I am grateful for all the wonderful friends and family around me. I am particularly grateful that we had so much time with my aunt after she was diagnosed with cancer. (Drs gave her three months but she survived six years)

3- I am grateful for learning to appreciate past relationships and not having to fallout with people when a relationship breaks up. It is so much nicer to look back fondly on the good times and what we brought to each other, rather than stew and brood. (Which I was not adverse to, believe me! I could do anger and self pity very well)

4-I am grateful to see my little furry friend wagging her tail and doing her little happy dance every day when we wake up, or when I come back home. I only recently noticed the little heart shaped pink patch on her nose. My little care bear disguised as a jack russell lol. :)

5-I am grateful for all the signs I am given, that smiley tree trunk in my backyard, the beetle crossing the road in front of me, etc.

And just because I am feeling generous and extremely grateful today
6- I am grateful for amazon who delivered my books, so I can start studying and preparing for my beginners course.

Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on June 28, 2016, 08:50:34 pm
Em Hotep Anippe811!

Thank you for taking the time to share these insights with us. It can be very uplifting to see where a moment of gratitude can take us, and can see how it transforms our way of thinking.

Senebty!
~Rev. Mesetibes
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Nehwen on August 29, 2016, 10:18:05 am
Em hotep!

I'd started doing something like this on Facebook a long time ago, and then lapsed fairly quickly.  It's an excellent thing, though, to stop every now and again (weekly, daily, what have you) and actively consider what you're grateful for, particularly if you're not in the best place mentally.

I am thankful for:

1) Eric.  He doesn't like change in his routine all that much, and letting me and the two cats into his life and his apartment has been a huge change for all of us.  Add my (our) older cat needing surgery in June for bladder stones, and it gets a little ridiculous.  I am beyond grateful for his love and his patience, and for loving the cats as much as I do.

2) The very hard lessons learned in the last several years.  I wouldn't be who I am without the experiences of the last ten years.  I could have done without the pain, but it has helped me grow as a person.

3) The current manager of our apartment building.  My understanding is that the last several managers were rather neglectful, and a lot of things fell apart.  She's got a lot on her plate, but the building is really coming together nicely.  I'm not actually sure that she sleeps, however...

4) The Minnesota Workforce Center in Anoka County, specifically the people connected to the Office and Administrative Training program.  They are dedicated to a participant's success.  As long as you're equally dedicated, they will do everything to a) make sure you succeed, b) make sure you have the tools to get the internship you want, and c) make sure you have the tools to find a job in the field.  There is no cost for participants.

5) The friends I am slowly making here.  I only knew Eric when I moved here.  I'm getting to know his friends,  as well as people in the training program.

Senebty,
Nehwen
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: divinekemetic on August 29, 2016, 12:22:34 pm
I am grateful for my parents still letting me live in their apartment because I am mentally ill.

I am grateful to be gifted the knowledge and the "magic" my akhu left me with, even if I'm not a wiccan and follow her path. 

I am grateful to be able to do at least some things a day and not be succumed to chronic illness and be bedbound like on some days.

The most grateful I am for is, I still get normal pay from my dad (I work for his company) even if I haven't worked for a year almost because mental illness.

These things are what I'm grateful for and I am also grateful to be around such understanding Netjer, they understand if I'm unable to serve them sometimes and won't scold me for not doing worship or Senut for a day or two. Sure, I do try to do Senut or worship as often as possible but sometimes I'm not able to at all.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Tabiatitui on August 30, 2016, 03:29:59 pm
With today being a particularly difficult day, I wanted to post here and give myself a chance to evaluate my blessings.  I was crying in the office of an elderly woman in the financial aid department at my school today, and even though she told me she could do nothing to help my situation, I told her I thought her job must be difficult and thanked her for her time anyway.  She seemed surprised that I was thanking her through my tears, and then ushered me out of her office with very little ceremony.  I thought about this thread (which I've perused but never responded to), and I realized I almost always thank others as a reflex, or as a result of being raised to be polite.  I try to be as sincere as possible, but it's not always at the forefront of my mind, and I think I should try to be better about that.

Here are things I'm grateful for:
-The presence of my loved ones in my life: my boyfriend, grandparents, brothers, and dog are so full of love and color my life in unexpected ways, always.
-My previous healing from mental illness and the fact that I was able to cut out toxic presences and relationships because of it.
-The fact that I can attend school and live in a beautiful apartment and eat good food because of the gracious support of my family.
-The assistance of Netjer and particularly my Parents in supporting me, helping me remain organized and motivated, and showing me the beauty in every day.
-The teachers here at the university who have supported me through all my difficult times in life and school, and who continue to support me.

Thank you for the opportunity to express my gratitude here!

Senebty.
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on September 01, 2016, 12:57:41 pm
Em Hotep everyone! *henu*

I am glad that this forum has assisted with being able to put thoughts into words, and allow people to express their levels of gratitude at the things they have in their lives. Sometimes it just takes that one moment to pause and reflect on what we do have, which will put the things we don't have into perspective.

Senebty, and thank you all for sharing!
~Rev. Mesetibes
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Johnny Charlton on November 10, 2016, 06:08:05 am
Thank you. It seems just like yesterday. I meditated upon actions of gratitude I witnessed.
#Esoteric Studies

Sent from my Z820 using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Tjemsy on November 16, 2016, 08:28:10 am
I am grateful for a very productive Sunday! I even started (and finished!) a book in that same day. I have had trouble reading lately, so I'm terribly pleased with myself, even if it was a "short" book. ^^;
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Ematsen on July 31, 2017, 01:55:48 pm
This is an older thread, but an important one, and I feel the best place to share how grateful I am for the amazing friends I've managed to keep in my life.

I have a small circle of friends that has stuck with me for years, and new friends who have even in the short time I've known them been a very positive and encouraging force to help me on a path to bettering myself and becoming a functioning human being. I am so, so incredibly grateful that they take time out of their own lives to spend with me. It is truly a blessing.

I am also grateful for the chance to renew myself in Zep-Tepi on this coming new year.

I'm grateful that I am here and breathing, continuing to slog through my mental health issues, and I'm grateful that my Parents are so patient, waiting for me to come back to Them.

I'm grateful for a fantastic community that is the same - wonderful people who are always with open arms full of love and kindness to their siblings in the faith. It's really a beautiful thing to see and experience. Thank you for being here, everyone. <3
Title: Re: Do you Gratitude?
Post by: Maretemheqat on August 08, 2017, 10:30:11 pm
Em Hotep Ematsen,

Good to "see" you again, and I'm glad you've been able to find a moment to find gratitude for the things in your life.

I've been very, very behind in maintaining this, only because Grad School ate my brain, but I do have some very amazing things to be thankful for.

Because of my hard work, I'm being asked to teach an Intro class this year for a small group of students. I wouldn't be doing so 100% on my own per se, as my thesis advisor is going to be watching me very closely for the time being until I can get myself established. Still, I was completely filled with gratitude when he told me that he was willing to back me when I was initially offered the position.

This also means I will be very hectic again this year, but that's fine.

Senebty, and Zep Tepi. :)

~Rev. Mesetibes